2013 is off to a bloated start.

uuuuuuugh happy new year. this part is always kind of a bummer for me after the massive cozy wintery charming love explosion of the holidays. what seemed awesome 2 weeks ago, things like baked goods and wine and salty cheese, I now find myself shaking an angry-old-man fist at. I also hate new years resolutions because they’re contrived and pressure-y and ultimately just shame-inducing and I already have enough of that. I struggle with balancing my love of all things wet-carb and wanting to look hot. lately I’ve let myself slide, the past 9 months have been a series of lovely celebrations, capped off with thnksgiving/birthday/christmas and omigod I’m bloated. I’m always cold and tired. I don’t feel good. I don’t crave good things. I feel polluted. I want really salty creamy pasta and an entire bottle of white wine and coffee ice cream for dessert.

I have no desire to restrict or punish myself, not because I’m super into self-acceptance, but mostly because I know that doesn’t last. what I am interested in is why I want salt and gluten and alcohol and caffeine and little else lately. I want to understand, without judgement, why I want those things and what my body is telling me it really needs (see chart thing below that I found on the internet, sorry about the douchers at the very bottom I didn’t put them there).

SO. I’m going to try. I’m going to make different decisions at the grocery store,  I’m going to pay attention to the way I feel mood and energy-wise after I eat, I’m going to try to imagine what I eat being used by my body (sorry if that sounded cheesy. mmm cheeeeeesy), I’m going to try to work up a sweat for at least 10 mins a day (or something), I’m going to go several nights (!) in a row without having wine, I’m going to sleep without sleeping pills and try to be kind to my poor lethargic and water-retention-y body. my heart is very full of love and for that I’m super grateful, but my tummy is very full of fettucini and for that I have heart burn. here we go 2013!

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xo j.

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~ by JuliaTriplett on January 7, 2013.

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